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Posts Tagged ‘rebirth’

Axial Tilt! Time for “No”; “No” for time.

In Meditations with Marcus, my charmed life, NYFA journals, Restart on December 21, 2014 at 3:05 pm

Psychedelic Buddha

To honour the rebirth of the Sun, I did my sun salutations on the rooftop today. I’m so glad the building was considerate enough to put up this sign, so that my meditations with Marcus could remain uninterrupted.

IMG_2887It seems ludicrous to be bound by so many conventions. No? I’m not the only one breaking the rule. Today’s meditations are joined by psychedelic Buddha and D.H. Thoreau. Together, on this shortest day of the year, we’re saying that if you don’t have time? It’s time to say “no”. Saying “no” is the only way to reclaim your life, and your time. Trust me, I did it for pretty much all of November. I upset a lot of people. I’m not sorry.

Axial tilt is the reason for the season… a literal call for the reconsideration of your “YES” and “NO” lists.

Get out of your head. You have two hands – one hand to stop and say NO; the other to remain open and say YES.

Three Septembers ago, I moved to NY, in order to

“…give up the life [I] planned in order to have the life that is waiting for [me].”

Well… everything in moderation. Even Joseph Campbell, whose mindwaves were coloured by mythology. Mythology.
Repeat: “mythology”.
Repeat until something changes.
Repeat for three years and then some.

Acting school, notably, my wonderful improv coaches, have drilled me to say YES to almost anything. “…and then a DINOSAUR jumped out of the woods” – “YES!” Crazier narratives have unfolded, and ever the poster student, I took this rule, and applied it to everything – dangerously without discrimination. The prolific results became, of course, fertile grounds of material for Meisner classes, as well as overwhelming fortification of my monstrous tear-ducts. Everything just feeds into one another.

“Repeat until something changes.

Ever late to the party, it was only a couple months ago, did I realize that while saying YES – the way we’re trained as actors, make us terrific partners under imaginary circumstances, in the real world, we just become:
A) gophers who would take shit from those whom we mistakenly allow into our lives, and
B) bitches who would do anything.

The intention to be open to the world, without due diligent attention to where and whom we are giving our life, could derail us, destroy us. Saying YES could become self-sabotaging. Everything in moderation.

The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it.” — Henry David Thoreau

The holiday season assaults us with commercialism on steroids. Markets operate on dollars, but we operate on life. You can’t price-tag value… you can’t buy worthiness. Worth doesn’t go on sale. The most valuable present is your time and presence.

So, here are my two cents worth of notes to self, to share:

1) Listen, because you have double the listening faculties as you do with speaking. Listen to yourself; listen to your thoughts; listen to your closest ones; listen to what’s hard to hear… Don’t believe in the praise; don’t believe in the sweet talk; don’t dwell on a liar’s promise.

2) Create in the imagined world, far, far away from and beyond the Starbucks world, in which you live. Yet beauty remains in the options and pursuit of better beans. *cough Counter Culture, *cough Intelligentsia, *cough Stumptown.

3) Say no, because the above already adds to two-hands full.

Happy Winter Solstice. Celebrate with a glass of grapes, caffeinated beans, and something sharp with raw ginger. Celebrate over music and prayer… the kind of embrace of a Scholar, Emperor, and Military Leader. J.Campbell, your myths don’t burn me anymore.

Sunday, you’ll forgive me that my “No” hand is out for the rest of the day, while my “YES” hand will be carrying my favourite bottle of grapes, and open to the company of my choosing. If you need me, send carrier pigeons. I yoga daily on my rooftop.

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